The Pudge Report - June 7, 2024

I’ve got kids, and the bathroom is my solace.

And while I’m solacing I don’t want to have to turn my phone sideways or click on something to see it better or pinch the screen to zoom in or out. I just want to use one thumb to scroll, that’s it.

If that sounds like you then this newsletter is for you.

TON Takes the Fast Lane: Who Needs Hype When You’ve Got Growth? 🚀

Telegram’s blockchain, The Open Network (TON), is laughing all the way to the bank, skyrocketing its TVL from a measly $14 million to a whopping $386 million this year. Toncoin even kicked Cardano out of the top 10 like it’s taking out the trash, thanks to the Open League incentives and a cozy Tether partnership. Turns out, having 900 million Telegram users isn't just for memes and spam—it's the backbone of a web3 empire. 😏
Read the full scoop.

Base Steals OP Mainnet’s Thunder: Welcome to Base Season 🌩️

Base just gave OP Mainnet a wedgie and took its lunch money, climbing to a cool $1.7 billion in TVL. With DEXs like Aerodrome and Uniswap pumping in $714M and $312M respectively, Base now trails only Arbitrum and Blast. Coinbase's marketing muscle and smart wallets are making Base the darling of the Superchain—it’s officially Base Season, baby. 💪
Full story here.

Cardano Volume Explosion: From Stablecoin Jokes to FOMO Frenzy 🚀

Cardano’s trading volume just had a glow-up, skyrocketing 170% in a day to over $1 billion because apparently, people remembered it exists. ADA’s price is finally moving, hitting $0.49 and shutting up those "ADA is a stablecoin" jokes. With this surge, the FOMO is real, and the drama is set to unfold. But let’s see if there’s any follow through first. 📈
Read it here.

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DeFi Loans Surge: Chasing Yields Like There’s No Tomorrow 💰

DeFi is on fire with on-chain borrowings hitting $11 billion, thanks to Ether.fi and Ethena. Ether.fi’s eETH and Ethena’s USDe have ballooned to $6.4 billion and $3.2 billion, respectively, proving DeFi degens are still hunting for those sweet, sweet yields. With Aave's V3 nearing $6 billion, DeFi strategies are getting more complex—and lucrative. 📊
Full story here.

Big Shorters vs. MicroStrategy: Betting Against Saylor and Losing 🥵

Big shorters are sweating bullets, holding $6.9 billion against MicroStrategy while MSTR stocks laugh in their faces with a 190% rise. Despite their best efforts, Michael Saylor's Bitcoin obsession is paying off, putting short sellers in a very uncomfortable position. If MSTR keeps climbing, expect these shorts to bail faster than a cat on a hot tin roof. 💸
Full story here.

Litecoin Outshines Ethereum: The Silver to Bitcoin’s Gold Polishes Up 🌟

Litecoin just flexed on Ethereum with a 75% surge in active addresses, outpacing ETH by over 100,000. Daily transactions hit a peak of 426,000, showing Litecoin isn't just Bitcoin's sidekick anymore. With adoption soaring, LTC might just hit $100 soon, proving it’s still got plenty of fight left. 💪
Read more.

Runes Crush BRC-20 and Ordinals: Bitcoin’s New Darling 📈

Runes protocol is dunking on BRC-20 and Ordinals with 150,000 daily transactions, proving it's the new hotness in Bitcoin token standards. With efficient fungible token creation, Runes is making Bitcoin more than just digital gold. The protocol's success shows Bitcoin is evolving into a playground for creative and complex financial instruments. 🌟
Full story here.

Hulk Hogan’s $17 Million Crypto Body Slam: The Rug Pull of the Century 💸

Hulk Hogan’s meme coin, HULK, just pulled off a $17 million rug pull, slamming investors harder than any wrestling move. One minute, HULK was flying high; the next, it crashed to $11,000, leaving investors dazed and confused. Hogan claims innocence, but the stench of another celebrity crypto scam is unmistakable. 🤦
Full story here.